Friday, September 08, 2006

The secret power of weddings

I have this funny feeling deep inside of me that makes me kind of think that.... I have the potential to be a Bridezilla. Two things gave me the feeling that this could never happen. 1) I'm already technically married, so this wedding-like event/reception that will take place in about a year really shouldn't be that big of a deal. Right? 2) I've never been the "wedding I've always dreamed of" type of girl. Or is it that I never had a concrete vision of what I'd want my wedding to be like??? Perhaps.

I've been married since April. Apparently I have not "officially" announced this to the world because I have not officially sent written announcements to billions of people I've never met (yes, "Dixie", my mom's Big Sister in her sorority* is on the list to receive one).

Can you tell by my sarcasm toward wedding announcements that this is not an item that I've been dreaming about since girlhood? So this should be no big deal right? I should just pick a cream colored card out of the book, put our names in the blanks, ask my mom really nicely to help me address them, slap some stamps on and call it done eh?

So why is it that I want my announcement to be Beautiful with a capital B? Why have I been scheming and drafting and toying with color swatches for the past 4 months? Why is it that I instinctively wanted to slap my father when he suggested that "people are going to look at them for 30 seconds and then throw them away!" ? Why do I so desire to have people open these announcements, take them from their beautiful deckled edge square flapped envelopes, gasp while covering their mouths and sigh "My gawwwd.... she has exquisite taste! What a lovely couple."

Is it only going to get worse from here? I've already gone on the record as saying that I don't want a fancy foofy dress. Will that all change once I actually start looking for one? I even joked about silly center-pieces. Will I soon discover that I simply must have fabulous centerpieces, for they are the heart of a nuptial table?!?

Am I really that concerned with what other people (who, for the most part, I don't even know) think of me?

I've come to accept that there is a part of me who does care about what others think of me, and because I'm a brassy blue-state girl, I try like hell to hide that. I think Ann Coulter would say that is part of my Liberal faith.

But there is one great equalizer in this world. One thing that can bring even the MOST self confident, not-giving a rat's ass what Dixie thinks of her-type of girl to her knees.

Her wedding.


There it is. That's the secret.


* I can make fun of sorority girls because I am one.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

I will now admit that I obsessed over the save the dates and invitations for my wedding. I spent more time choosing them and researching on-line then I did with anything! Actually I think I obsessed slightly about my dress too but the point is - you realize once you get into the planning stages that you REALLY do care about whether or not you choose the invitation with Prescious Moments or the one with the castle and white horse.

Anonymous said...

I don't think my wife ever gave me such a look of pity and disgust as when I asked why the wedding announcements had to match the wedding invitations since they were going to different people. Apparently this is a very foolish quesion....

Lisaopolis said...

Potential to be Bridezilla? Don't sell yourself short--you ARE Bridezilla!;) In a good way.

Lisaopolis said...

PS: youve confirmed my long-standing desire to (A) just live in sin and/or (B) elope and sent electronic announcements that can be deleted, lol;)

Gus said...

just send a invite. we dont care what it looks like, as long as it has the time, date, and specifics. throw a cougar symbol on it just to be safe.

we will be there.

Anonymous said...

love the mr. husband's practical question and how it was met by his envisioning woman!

but it makes sense that you want everything to be just right! i definitely find myself embarrassed to admit how much time things can take. so many things can be done without much thought that taking time can feel WIERD. whatth!%^

cheers to putting your dreams out in the jagged world!

Anonymous said...

First off - don't watch Platinum Weddings. I did, and now it's on my DVR to record every week, I don't know who has the money to do this stuff but it's fascinating. I frightened Steve when he saw it. As I've always preached the same thing about weddings ..

Two - Jo told me last week "here's your save the date. June 9th. There is it."

I thought it was brilliant, classy and a bit absurd *and* it cost her nothing.

tz said...

The first time I saw a 'save the date' was on your fridge when I came out for your other wedding and I thought what a fantastic idea. And as what always happens with cool ideas like that, I go to 'I want a wedding do-over' It's six years away, and I already have a 20th anniversary-renew-our-vows party planner file! And, as I had to tell one of my own bridesmaids after an uncalled for temper tantrum about the time of the rehersal dinner....'It is my f&*&ing wedding' so you go and do whatever it is you want to do, it is YOUR WEDDING.