An American Phenomenon

The Bachelorette Party. An Institution in to itself. Its too early for me to write much, I woke up too early, and now I think I need to get back in bed for another hour or so, but I wanted to say hello to you. And thanks for reading.

Last night was my friend Katie's bachelorette party. She's getting married in a couple of weeks, and until last night, I hadn't seen her in about 2 years. There were some other people there too who I hadn't seen in a long time, so it was nice to reconnect with some of those ladies. Though it was a little awkward when I asked a friend's little sister, "So, how's your baby!?" (because she had just had a new baby when I spoke to her last...) Her response was, "Oh, he's great! He's five months old now, so things are starting to settle down a little bit." Yeah, this was baby number 2. And big brother is now 2 1/2 years old. And I ask you all: Since when do my friend's little sisters have 2 kids??

This was a traditional Bachelorette party. None of this "quiet girls' weekend in Napa" business. This was your standard Stripper, hotel room, loud bar, dressed up bachelorette type of night. Fortunately or unfortunately, I missed the stripper, and didn't join the party until dinner. Just think, I was picking up my bike after a tune-up while some poor girl in the bridal party was getting dry-humped by a guy trying to work his way through his massage school. Sweet. Can't say I was too disappointed, as by all accounts, the guy was described as "well... Kind of... aggressive?" More proof that sometimes guys, even paid professionals, just don't Get It.

As it were, we went to Seattle's OTHER dueling piano bar last night to start the festivities. Who'da though that I would be touring the piano bars of Seattle each weekend this summer? There were about eleventeen other bachelorette parties there that night, making the place packed with crazy women looking to party. This prompted me to say under my breath, (quite inappropriately I might add) as we were leaving toward the 2 shy, quiet guys that were coming into the bar:

"If those two can't get laid tonight, it'll never happen."

Why do I have to be so surly and crass sometimes? Well, what's done is done. I hope they took it as encouragement.

For some reason I just wasn't feeling totally alive and awake. I really tried, but I was just too tired to stay out very long. I guess I can only have the real crazy weekends once a month or so. I came home to my apartment to discover that I had forgotten to lock my refrigerator. The tell-tale signs being: food all over the floor and a fat dog on the couch pretending to still be asleep to avoid punishment.

Now I know that very few of you have actually seen this occurrence, so after some very quick clean up last night, here are some photos that I took this morning of the wreckage. Please note: this is VERY mild compared to Daphne's earlier works, as I keep very little food in the refrigerator these days.

Exhibit A) I forgot to double lock my refrigerator. Silly me.


Please note patches of yellow egg yolk dried into carpet. That'll be fun to clean up... And I think that was a jar of salad dressing in the corner. Dogs love Lite Ranch dressing.



These were the egg shells that were big enough to pick up easily from the floor.
"Still life with Eggs and Smart Balance"

And here is my lady-friend who is behind it all. She is still sleeping on the couch. And snoring a bit now.