Too many dips, among other things.

That's all there is to it. I just had way too many dips.

My sister's birthday was this past weekend and I volunteered my house for the party on Saturday night. Somewhere along the line, I managed to morph my role in the party into "I'm planning, throwing and paying for the party." (note to self- maybe stop doing this...)

Anyway- it was scheduled for 7:30, so I was hoping people wouldn't come too hungry. Don't get me wrong, I love my sister, but I wasn't terribly interested in serving dinner to 25 of her friends. I did however, want to have some "hearty hour devours" for those who might need a little something to absorb their wine.

I went to Costco (my happy place) to secure provisions. I found a big old ham and bought it. I will do this again. Ham is delicious, and it's easy to eat off of throughout the evening, regardless of sobriety levels. Plus, I'm back on the west coast where you can typically assume that most guests aren't concerned about keeping Kosher. It was a spiral cut and fully cooked number, so all I had to do was heat it up and glaze. Easy enough.

I figured that the table needed a bit more than just a giant ham and some plates, so I also planned on a bread basket and assorted cheeses, a fruit tray with some yummie cinnamon fruit dip, and a veggie tray. And of course the veggies needed a dip. Humm... Ranch dip is good, but kind of tired and not everyone likes ranch style dips, so I'll get some hummus too. But some people like hummus with pita, so I'll grab this bag pita chips too. They were right next to the tortilla chips, and what's a party without tortilla chips? Plus, what if more people than I've planned for for show, up? Tortilla chips are a good filler.... They were thrown into the cart. But crap- now I need salsa. Oh look- pico de gallo is being sampled... yum! Into the cart. Hum... getting a little tex-mex theme here... hey look at this guacamole, (on display next to the pico). Fresh, pre-made guac at a reasonable price? Sign ME up. I should also get some mixed nuts or something for the coffee table... I can use that silver tray thingy with three sections... so I'll need three separate things....trail mix, raw almonds and oooo... chocolate covered almonds.

The theme of the party was 1971-derful (she was born in 1971, so this seemed like a great idea and year-appropriate dress was strongly encouraged) so a had to make a quick trip to the thrift shop for some duds that would help me pull off Yoko Ono. (note to self for next time- a redheaded chick with blue eyes, a black wig and fake tanner on her pale skin will never really be able to accomplish this look- I ended up looking more like Patti from the Millionaire Matchmaker... which I now fully intend to be for Halloween 2010...). While at said thrift shop, an absolutely fetching avocado-colored fondue set caught my eye. What's a 1971 party without fondue?!? It went into cart, along with my Yoko gear. This required an extra trip to the grocery store for appropriate cheeses and wines for the fondue, and stuff to dip into the cheesy goodness.

When I got home from the thrift shop, I had a voicemail from my dad: "Hey- I'm wondering what we should bring- I just got a bunch of chicken wings and was thinking I'd BBQ them and bring them tomorrow- okay, see you then!"

So- have you kept up?

Fruit dip
Ranch Dip*
Hummus
Pico de Gallo
Guacamole
Cheese Fondue w/
-cubed french bread,
-steamed broccoli
-steamed cauliflower
basket of Sliced Baguette
Assorted cheeses
Pita chips
Tortilla chips
Fruit tray
Veggie tray
Copious amounts of dad's chicken wings
Birthday cake

aaaaaaand......

A giant ham

Yes, this proved to be a bit of a HOT MESS and WAY too much food.

The lessons I've learned for future parties:
1) Know your audience- The guests were all my sister's friends, and they stayed for a while, had a few drinks and a polite amount of food, mingled a bit and left. They were not like the guests that we've typically had for our own parties; who arrive, mingle, have a few drinks, eat some food. Have a few more drinks, eat more, sing some karaoke with their new acquaintances and have some more drinks, then devour the food table with reckless abandon with their new best friends.

2) Stick to the plan!!
When I started, in my head, there would be a ham, some bread, mustard, fruit and veggies. The last minute fondue idea was better in my head than it was in practice. The unexpected bushel of chicken wings was no less than a tipping point for gluttony.

3) Shop with a list (that you've developed from your plan- and stick to the list!)

4) Don't try to cater to guests theoretical needs/wants. No one will have less fun at a party due to lack of sufficient dip options. That seems obvious in hindsight...

5) Have a leftover party. I could easily feed another party with the contents of my refrigerator today. If I don't, I'm going to hurting for Tupperware containers for the next week or so, while mine are all in use. If anyone wants to get married today and have their reception at my house (menu above), please let me know. If you want to have a 1971 theme, or a Yoko Ono (or Patti Stranger) look alike as the officiant, I can accommodate.



* toss 1 c of cottage cheese, 1t salt, a clove of minced garlic and some fresh chopped parsley into your blender or food processor. Hit power button until smooth. Make it a day ahead and refrigerate so the garlic can work its magic. Cheap, easy, happy.